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From: Construct F V4.1.7 [Frizbang4@caltech.edu]
Sent: Tuesday, November 6, 2012 5:35 PM
To: Cordeall, Nostrand E.
Subject: 01001110 01101111 01110011 01110100 01110010 01100001 01101110 01100100


01001110 01101111 01110011 01110100 01110010 01100001 01101110 01100100

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From: Construct F V4.1.7 [Frizbang4@caltech.edu]
Sent: Tuesday, November 29, 2012 5:35 PM
To: Cordeall, Nostrand E.
Subject: 01001110 01101111 01110011 01110100 01110010 01100001 01101110 01100100


01001110 01101111 01110011 01110100 01110010 01100001 01101110 01100100 0101110 0100000 01010010 01100101 01110100 01110101 01110010 01101110 0101110   

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From: Construct F V4.1.7 [Frizbang4@caltech.edu]
Sent: Tuesday, December 11, 2012 5:35 PM
To: Cordeall, Nostrand E.
Subject: 01001110 01101111 01110011 01110100 01110010 01100001 01101110 01100100

01001001 01001110 01001000 01000101 01010010 01001001 01010100 01001111 01010010 0101110

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From: Cordeall, Nostrand E {ihatemyboss@yahoo.com]
Sent: Tuesday, Decembter 12,2012 12:12 PM
To: Stupid dumb robot
Subject: Re:
01001001 01001110 01001000 01000101 01010010 01001001 01010100 01001111 01010010 0101110
____________
Yes














 

Unreadable Tombstone

Gonna call my sign-off notification Unreadable Tombstone. Like unreadable tombstone out lol. Like a movie lol. WELL ITS TIME TO PUT AN END TO THE DEAD WALKING I keep finding ghouls running around the homes wearing pink and bright green sashes, I see bad habits, I see consumption of flesh, I dream in an office with incense, I will escape to the Frisbee basement tonight

Now. First way gathering supplies, and I was armed about head to foot with guns of various scenes movie scene from the matrix. I was pretty badass and was talking a lot about crows and junk, and I had on black chains and a crown made of boot work.

Someone had giver Wheels a headset and she been racing around listen to god knows what basement rock is on there. She said, “Yams called from Amsterdam. He says he’s coming back. He says you killed his son.

I  was all types of nervous, DJ A.M. had been Yams’. Had a pup and knows I did him in with the meat. And I knew I had two choices: stay here, face the wrath of a Vietnam veteran who stuck Charlie with sharpened bed spikes while they slept, I took a deep breath and knew my other option, to sink down to Frisoprea (because it was rumored he had built a city in the goddamn basement) where I would wander among the Dark Coated People, with the spider dogs with the green paint filled mouths and spoke through  various squelches of their coagulate spittle.

It was the fact that Grisbee offered to accompany me so I did get me a tad emotional, I darn neared killed the boy several times over but he keeps coming back. I tell that lad to tend to the hungry, the sick, because I had become too weary to do good to them.

I tell you I had words with my boss – we discussed the future of the grounds, the homeless services, Grounds keeper del ray who talks with the watch keeper late in the gardens, and the Mitch Hoys as I call them, sleeping like slugs in the corner of god knows what floor. Shit that needed dealt with.

This place will miss me. I flee a murderer, I return a champion. The Nameless Prince, Nostrander, Inheritor.

I don’t know what entity will take up these writings. Well if it’s me, I’ll be a happy man, ere these notes of the graveyard placed and penned with an ending.

-Nostrand

Video Game Reviews Epidose 3: Resident Evil 6

Another failed effort by CRAPCOM. Basically just pick up a Mario or zeldas game if you want to play a mans game this is just laughable. SUPERMAN 64 WAS A BETTER GAME OR THAT ONE ABOUT SNAKES IN THE DESERTE OR EVEN THE ONE WITH THE MAN WHO DOES THE BAD THINGS TO POKOHONTIS IN THE DESRT OR SUPER DESERT RAPE 64(THE WORST GAME) 

Graphics 2/10
Where are the child zombies? Where are the zombies of fat people and where are the Hispanick zombies? I have seen those kinds of things in this home on numerous outbreaks didn’t see a single zombie in a wheelchair either which was worst of all prepare for cripple community backlash. Game froze on every level and then the game screams for not saving like a man. WHAT IF POWER OUTAGE?? I can count on my hands how many time the chris redfred clipped through a zombie, I counted at least 17 clippings in the first chapter alone and everytime I tried to make leon kenedy swim YOU CAN’T DO IT FOLKS, HEY I CAN SHOOT EVERY SNIPER RIFLE EVERY MADE BUTI CANT’ SWIM SPLASH AROUND LIKE A MAGICCARP (why doesn’t leon have his sword in this one btw(
Graphics 1/10 CLIPPING ARRRGGGHGHHH you lose a point for no co op

Zombie coon stomp actually a pretty fun minigame you get your coon stomp multiplyer pretty high and then the fat coon comes out and sprays his poop and pee dodge it to hget your multiplayer even higher

Zombie Birds

The Boss in the third level kind of looks like MY BOSS LOL



Sound: Numerous zombie moans in the game are good but the girl characters who keep asking you why they get paid less to shoot zombies as aman when he does it. SOUND IN THIS GAME MADE ME SEXIST 2/10 Music is actually pretty good but it drowns out the coon screams too much, TOO MUCH


Playability: 3/10
CALL OF DUTY CLONE ENOUGH SAID


Multiplayer 
and Story
1.5/10 – This is some of the worst writing I have ever seen in a game Once again you are in raccoon city because we all know we haven’t got enough of THAT ONE (sarcasm) not a single black playable character once again – racism is worse than resident evil 5 which was over the top, a white man killing thousands upon thousands of black men in Haiti during an earthquake AND ITS RATED T FOR TEN (do black people live in asia by the way I do not know, if not then this would explain the cultural divide and the lack of tolerance but still this game takes place in America and we have a kenyian president now so please crapcom this is 2012…next time learn about CULTURAL COMPETENCY and put a black in the game.

More Racist than Racists evil 5

Gameplay: Moving your character feels like pushing a sack of basketballs with a grocery cart and three of the wheels keep getting stuck and the little kid with his mom in line with you keeps screaming so you crab a handful of paydays and start whipping them at him in the face in your rage and the next time you go in there the manager says OH NO YOU CAN’T SHOP IN HERE ANYMORE SIR EVEN THOUGH THIS IS AMAERCA BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU DID TO MY SON


Overall: 0/10 I cannot recommend this game to any boy or girl looking to sink their teeth into a zombie sim. This is theworst of the series and the racism/sexcism/crippleism is over the top. Just because theres never been a black Mario doesn’t mean its ok for you to do it too. CRAPCROM IT IS NEVER OK TO HIT A WOMAN EVEN A ZOMBIE WOMAN. CRAPCORN I SAW THIS HAPPEN MULTIPLE TIMES IN YOUR GAME. PLEASE ALERT THE WOMANS WRITES

I SHUDDER TO THINK (on sale now at Ebooks by Nostrand get your copy at your nearest e retailer [sic]) img.

I AM A WAGAR MAN. MY WAGERING HAS GOTTEN ME PLENTY OF REDDITS WRITTEN ABOUT ME AND MY NEFARIOUS SCHEMES BUT HERE ARE THE COLD SCREWED FACTS. THE TROUBLE OF YESTERYEAR STARTED OF COURSE FROM THAT OLIMPICK GOLD METALIST THAT I WAGERED FOR AND BROUGHT INTO THIS HOME AND COUNTRY BUTI MUST ADMIT THAT I HAVE BECOME A MAN OF SOME RENOUN IN THIS COMMUNITY DUE TO THE ANTI-AMERICAN SENTIMENTS THAT FOLLWS THE LITERAL PURCHASE OF A HUMAN BEING AND SUBSEQUENT TRAFFIC OVER A NUMBER OF ILLEGAL NORTH MIGRATING SHINA MEN (THESE ARE LIKE CHINESE MAN BUT DIFFERENT - THEY WEAR STAR ARMOR FOR ONE FOR ALSO BOAST OF THEIR TERRIFYING LONG BOAT ‘SLAVE EATER’ WHICH IS WRITTEN IN MAJESTIC GREEN AND AZURE RHINESTONES EACH LETTER THE SIZE OF A MONSTER TRUCK WHEEL BUT THE GIANT SLAVESHIP STAFF ARE VERY IMPOLITE, REFUSING YOU TELL YOU THE TIME OF DAY AND WHIPS THAT CRACK THROUGHOUT THE NIGHT LIKE A MEWING BABE AND THE GUY SLEEPING NEXT TO YOU WHO KEEPS TRYING TO TAKE YOUR THINGS WHILE YOU SLEEP!) I SAID SLAVE EATER MORE LIKE SLAVE MAKE YOU SLEEPER#slavery AS WELL AS INCIDENTS AS OCCURRED AS A RESULT AND DUE TO STATE AND FEDERAL STANDARDS AND PRACTICES BEEN ORDERED TO POST ALL CURRENT SAFETY HAZZAZZARDS AND SUBSEQUENT CONCERNS ON THE WEB. THIS HOME IS BUT A COLD HARD SEA THAT TUMULTS AND SWAYS AND EVEN I CANNOT PREDICT OR NAY COMPREHEND EACH DAY’S EVENTS THIS OLYMPIC STAR IS FAT AS A TRACTOR TRAILOR SHE WORN HER MEDALS BY LIFTING WEIGHTS THAT ARE OF EQUAL OR LARGER VALUE THAN HER OWN WEIGHT WHICH IS TO SAY SEVERAL HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF POUNDS. I CALL THIS GIRL TREEHORN. THE NAMELESS CALL HER THE MOUNTAIN THAT BREATHES.


I’m going to move aside and let grounds keeper Del Ray talk about Treehorn because I raged pretty hard while writing that and need to clean up so here’s Del Ray folks! ok how do I ok there ain’t a nary day go by that ol’ treehorn ain’t be getting’ where’ she ain’t sposed to be getting’. I say in full sight of the lord our jesuses pretty golden winglitts that that thar treehorn woman is by far the fattest, meanest, most sorriest piece of saddal trash you ever did meat. Why, just the other day me and mitch hoy, which was of course before old Nostrand came out in a fury saying that mitch hoy was to be excommunicated and if anyone didn’t know what he meant, they could take it up with DJ AMs ghost.

And me and ol mitchy boy sittin’ there just checking her out for she darn near but didn’t move for darn near a week, and hadn’t eaten or rolled over to sleep. And I needed her to move for she was a blockin’ the roots to my lawn equipment! And when we came over to have a spell together she finally started to speak to me. She explained to me that she didn’t really need food because she already ate enough for one lifetime her momma said to her once. And she said that she was not structurally sound enough to physically move her legs, even a muscle after playing in the parking lot with papa. We respected the fat mountain who would not eat and told us stories of life on the road rollin’ from state to state and lifting darn near anything that got in her way including a buic lasaber.

That’s when the big lady sorta shuddered a little bit
 and something came out of her that looked a bit like this

That’s when that fat ol mountain told us her name was Kathy.

Welp she and Mitch were to be wed she said, no ifs ands or butts, and if he didn’t like it, well he can take it up with DJ AM’s ghost (that’s what everyone said in those days to get what they wanted)

And that’s bout all I needs ta say about that woman but here Nostrand has a few more things to say about her see ya folks!



I’m also pretty sure she has TRUCKDNA because once I saw her outside wrestling with a truck in the parking lot for three whole hours and she kept rooting around the inside and then she would come back out and start flipping the entire truck over and over and when she finally finished she came back inside and said THAT’S MAH POPS! Her clothing is little more than bits and scraps of mcdonalds and burger king hamburger wraps. And between her flops of skin are strange skeletal remains that tumble to the floor and when I asked her what that’s about she said WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK MAN.

She has lost her mind somewhat and constantly whines about the children she left at the daycare 25 years ago. For like the hundredth time!! Who cares!!!

So anyway that’s the first danger that I’m posting you all better be happy it took me well over 10 minutes to write this and have already made me miss my honey bb evening specials.


All staff and residents please be aware of the following anomalies posted as dictated by THE DEPARTMENT OF PUBLIC WELFARE - herein lies all concerns:

§ 2600.82. Poisons. All poisons are color code based on danger. I think red or blue means it is the most lethal and then we put green stickers on things OK to eat like lemonade and treats. Yes red is the most leathal. I had to check my Poison Graph there it was underneath my kibble stash. Addendum 1 It is hard to read the poison graph because I wrote a lot of mean things on it about Obama.

§ 2600.103. Food service. Believe it from me it is not OK to store blue koolaid in the leftover anti-freeze container and keep it in the fridge! That’s a fact, the police will come!

§ 2600.221. Activities program. We watch honey boo boo on TV all day everyday just to make sure we don’t miss any of honey boo boo’s adventures and tricks. The reason I mention this is due to the group of men who call themselves the Honeybros on the third floor. Those guys can get pretty rowdy!!

§ 2600.182. Medication administration. A lot of people are asking about “the dream chair.” Please note that the dream chair is simply a mechanical device with restraining shackles.

§ 2600.85. Sanitation. All residents must be readably available to combat the root creature that has taken to living in its dark nest behind the shed in the backyard. The root creature is surprisingly agile and capable of bending to avoid your attacks.

§ 2600.109. Pets. Be warned I have a cat on the premisis called F.M which stands for FIBERMYALGIA. This is a word a lot of people with a TON OF CASH throw around on the internet and its pretty much a name that a darn good cat like F.M. deserves. This is different than A.M. cat by a long shot, who is DJAMS old cat. I found that cat rootin around my subpoenas and ledgers. Dear police I will not be responding to your suppinis because the deceased’s cat ripped them all up in a tremendous catrage when I yelled at it for rootin around in my ledgers.

§ 2600.121. Unobstructed egress. I don’t think this really needs to even be mentioned but just in case :-) I have built the world’s first homeless ant farm and a quarter of the home has been devoted to the several metric tons of sand poured and tunnels built in them for the dirty men to root around in looking for loose change and cans of CHEF BOY R D RAVING RAVIIOLIE which is OK to say because of the entire protect being funded by chef boyrd inc Thanks For the HoboAnts! (Hobants) THIS DOES BLOCK EMERGENCY EXITS A THROUGH D ON THE THIRD AND FOURTH LEVELS
Boy oh boy you are a delicious meal after a hard day work thanks for bringing are families together over a steaming bowl of spaghetti juice getting paid to say this.

The only resident I would warn anyway about is Frisbee, King of the Nameless, who at this point I can only fathom is more machine than man because of the things I hear coming from the basement like IM A MACHINE IM A MACHIIIIINNNE followed by loud bangs and screaming and we had to remove the door to the basement because it started growing human eyes. I destroyed the eye door myself! Don’t go making a huge fuss!! Addendum 2 Am beginning to pick up strange sounds coming from the Frisbee lair will be keeping an eye on this!

Get a Life if you think I am dealing with any of these problems because that root creature is something from my darkest dreams, and the dream chair isn’t going anywhere, and I’m  sick and tired of these homeless men puking into their ravolia cans so I’ll take care of that one goodbye America!

 

HOYS R US

SO HOYO THERE FOLKS ITS ME AGAIN, BACK FROM MY LATE BIRTHDAY VACATION I WENT TO THE CITY AND LET ME TELL YOU THEY DO THINGS A LITTLE BIT DIFFERENT THERE, TO THE POINT OF BEING ALIENATING. I DO NOT WISH TO RECOUNT MY NIGHTMARISH STORIES OF THERE BUT I WILL TELL YOU THIS: GUMBO THE CLOUD CLOWN I WANT MY MONEY BACK YOUR CLOWN CLOUD WAS UNIMPRESSIVE AND I STILL CANT ACCESS MY DATA I DELETED THAT DATA FROM MY COMPUTER BECAUSE I FIGURED IT WAS SAFE IN THE CLOWN CLOUD AND NOW ITS ALL GONE BUT I DO HAVE SEVERAL .GIFS OF CLOWNS DOING CLOWN THINGS  AND WHILE THESE ARE HUMOURUS GIFS AND GIVE ME SEVERAL MOMENTS OF ENTERTAINMENT THEY CAN NOT REPLACE MY DATA SO I AM WILLING TO DEMAND ONLY 97% OF MY MONEY BACK DUE TO THE ENJOYMENT I GOT FROM YOUR GIFS. I WILL CONTACT THE BBB WITHOUT WARNING OR NOTICE YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED, CLOWN.

Anyway we got some new people in and boy do I take personal offense to every single one of them. It was okay at first, new faces and all that but then one of them started to rub me the wrong way and theyre all related so in the ways of my ancestors I ending up hating them all because my hero once said that we hate what we fear and we fear what we hate but in this case I don’t fear them anymore since ive found theyre harmless like small children and they act like them too so I don’t fear them I just hate them and yet I find that I am oddly drawn to them like a moth to the flames

It all started with this man named Mitch. Mitch Hoy. His name will forever haunt my dreams, and I had a dream last night where wheels came wheelin’ from the dark and scooted up to me with a spooked look on her face and with her big black eyes she jumped up out of the chair and grapped my shoulders and yelled MITCH HOY. She then took off and jumped over the canyon in my dreams, and mid way over the canyon hole she paused in mid air and spun around and screeched MITCH HOY again and flew off like a witch and the wheels turned into a bunch of snakes These are now my dreams.

Anyway im a pretty sociable feelow so I tried to talk to mitch to put an end to the madness before it got any worse (I had the dreams since the first day I met him and then I talked to him the second day), and he didn’t respond he didn’t even look at me he just looked at his lunch table deep in thought so I thought this was pretty weird. The dreams carried on, and the snakes eventually all had little prison tattoos on them saying TUNNEL HOY’S and some of them even had his hair on their snake heads and it wasn’t long before I had had enough. So, I talked to him again.

And he ignored me again. This sent me off real bad, but I didn’t want to anger his 35 family members who I forgot to mention are also now residents here and they were all sitting there but they all talked to each other so that ws fine and some even made eye contact and I said WHAT IM TRYING TO TALK TO MITCH HAVENT YOU EVERY TRIED IT WELL MAYBE YOU SHOULD HES YOUR FAMILY NOT MINE and stormed off. So I had to go to grisbee and he did a little detective work for me and found out that mitch doesn’t talk to anyone not even his girlfriend. After I got over the anger and jealously of how this chump can get a girlfriend and I cant even though Ive hit on ever woman in this place, I started forming my plans. Grisbee saw that planning look on my face and begged me to stop but I kicked him out of here and onto the street and I haven’t seen him since and that’s what he gets for assosciating with that hoy man. Unacceptable.

I hits the books that I had back in college so I learned that sometimes people stop talking after a traumatic event well ill give him trauma, I thought, and from that moment on I made it my holy war that I would break that dream invader and I would force him to break his silent oath and I would teach him and everyone in here who is the boss when I speak to you, you listen and speak back if I tell you to do so you don’t invade my dreams and get away with it. Even if you don’t have the powers to invade my dreams you still get out of them or youre paying the price.

Now by this point, mitch was somehow a pretty popular guy, and due to the tourbus that has been stopping by here every Thursday screaming, “THIS IS THE PLACE WHERE DJ AM WAS KILLED THE MURDERE IS STILL AT LARGE!” people around here have been a little suspicious of me even though I’ve been cleared of all crimes so I had to get creative, and with grisbee gone here we had the truets best gift from god and that is a scapegoat and a plan which was really appreciated because I was doing poorly in the polls versus mitch.

I started small, leaving a few pieces of paper with some words on them stuck to the walls talking about “dream invaders” just to let him know that it had started and that he had a chance to knock it off and it could end right there. Of course he didn’t. so then I started calling him out saying, “break the oath, mitch” and when that didn’t work and I got really mad, I decided to go all the way and say, “MITCH HOY, YOU ARE NOT SUPERIOR” and taped that one up all over the place and I mean all over the place; couldn’t get mashed potaters without seeing that three times and I had it taped to all the tvs and tables and even wheels, whom was a true friend because when anyone would try to take it from her chair she would scoot around in a circle and smack that broom I once gave her to fight zombies on the floor real bad and then take off down the hall.

Still my plan wasn’t working, so I had to resort to something else Drastic measures and drastic men and in war, even the innocent are guilty of warcrimes. So I set out to hunt the innocent- the ones he loved. Now I know from the movies that people don’t like it when people go after their loved ones, and no one else likes it either aside from the bad guy who seems to get a pretty good kick out of it but I would remind you that this is not a movie and mitch is the bad guy here and he was hurting me through his oath and its honourable for a man to get revenge when he has been slighted in this way this isn’t a movie so grow up and learn some lessons before you come and j udge me otherwise I wont help you when someone comes and hurts your heart and you want revenge on them.

Since things had by this point reached an all time low I decided to not mess around anymore and that I wouldn’t spare his family even the slightest bit of dignity for they hadn’t spared the slightest bit of mine because they always sided with mitch, which I can understand that  blood ties are strongest bonds but when youre wrong youre wrong and mitch is wrong so anyone who defends him is also wrong and that means his family. And I know I keep bringing up his family but that’s because everyone got mad at me because I did this but you know what? Its their fault, yell at them for being idiots don’t yell at me for going through all this trouble and pain to bring mitch down when he is CLEARLY WRONG.  Grapes called me petty I said thanks for the compliment but then he said “I did not say pretty” and so I looked it up and lets just say grapes hasn’t eaten in a week, if you catch the drift.

So I went and dove head first into that most personal of subjects: sex, and whoo boy. I think that pictures are worth more words than words so ill post the pictures (at least the ones that I had saved on my flash drive so I could turn all computer wallpapers into these pictures; a lot of the other ones were lost in the clown clud give me my money back, bozo!)

Anyway, after I did all of this a lot of people got really mad, and the hoys threatened to call the police and all kinds of stuff but I told them grisbee did it and I guess they just didn’t know what to believe. Anyway I didn’t get in trouble but I did find out after mitch hoy left for greener pastures that he was deaf and blind so sorry about that mitch. Before he left MY BOSS threw a “sorry about that Mitch” party and anywayThe people who always sat around him were Mexicans not Asians as I later would find out so they weren’t his family but they did say some nice things about him. ALSO his troll whore wife got up and said some things but then she also brought her husband up there with her and I thought she was cheating at on mitch at first but she was just Mitch’s caregiver her last name was Krupts not Hoy sorry Kathy! 

MITCH HOY IS MARRIED TO A TROLL TREE SEXING WHORE 

MITCH HOY

YOU ARE NOT SUPERIOR